Welcome to a riveting conversation with Elena Khodakivskaya, a woman who has gracefully danced through the intricate twists and turns of life. In this interview, Elena shares her profound insights and practical wisdom on embracing flexibility and adaptability, not as buzzwords but as life-altering skills that can be honed and applied to navigate the unpredictable journey we all embark upon. She is a PCC level coach, serial entrepreneur, woman, mother, daughter, partner, traveler, passionate health instructor, and much more.
Before we begin, let us stress that our goal is not to repeat obvious ideas about the importance of flexibility and adaptability. Instead, the discussion with Elena aims to examine the reality behind these concepts. It's hard to be flexible, it's challenging to be adaptable, it's even needed to apply those skills at all times, and yet, in moments we may not even expect, they can appear like a life raft.
Let's kick it off, shall we?
Q1. Interviewer:
Hello, Eli! It's so lovely to be able to tap into a topic that's of such importance with a person like yourself. Thank you for being open to doing this interview. For the readers, who wouldn't know you, can you please tell us more about yourself? What should eveyone who meets you for the first time know?
Elena's Reply:
Thanks for the invite. The topic we're about to cover is indeed close to my heart and important for many reasons. To introduce myself to those who don't know me, I'll start with the basics :) I am a woman and a mother of two wonderful, now grown and independent young adults. My professional journey has spanned over two decades, weaving through the realms of business, entrepreneurship, and the intricate tapestry of life. Now, I stand before your readers with a holistic perspective, seeing life as a seamless blend of interconnected dimensions. I am no longer confined by rigid boundaries and try to embody harmony that arises when all facets of life intersect comfortably.
Q2. Interviewer:
What experiences have nudged you to develop this holistic view of life that you speak about? If you allow me to be even more direct – what have you been through in your life from a professional and personal point of view that shaped your way of living today?
Elena's Reply:
My mosaic of experiences has both the joys of having my children, motherhood and business successes, developing initiatives from scratch, as well as the trials of divorce, international relocations, and living among various different cultures that challenge and stretch. Such pivotal moments, the highs and lows, have been the crucible of my understanding of flexibility and adaptability, shaping me into the resilient individual I am today.
Q3. Interviewer:
Thank you for sharing those snippets of your life. I know that myself and the readers don't take this honesty for granted. It's much appreciated.
Let me ask you this. With the growing areas of life-coaching, psychology, and personal development, it has become very common for us to talk about the importance of flexibility and adaptability in life, relationships, and work. It seems that the general advice is one and simple - “become as flexible and adaptive as possible” - what is your personal perspective on this? Should we all be flexible and adaptable and is there more to it?
Elena's Reply:
Flexibility and adaptability are innate attributes of the human body and psyche - a survival mechanism in a world where change is a constant. To harness their power, I personally emphasize the need for deliberate development of flexibility and adaptability on physical, emotional, and mental levels. I also want to dispel the notion that flexibility is a fixed trait. Everyone possesses the capability, waiting to be unlocked through practice and intention. Should we all be capable of living our lives with flexibility and adaptability as a skill that helps and supports us - yes. Should we all experience and practice these abilities the same way, at the same level of intensity, and in the exact same situations - no. The conscious development and management of such traits is part of the maturity process of the human psyche.
Q4. Interviewer:
How have you personally developed into a flexible and adaptable person? Were you simply forced by life's circumstances or do you have a system you can share?
Elena's Reply:
A crucial aspect of my journey involved learning to be attuned to my own emotions and internal states, making mindfulness a cornerstone in developing flexibility and adaptability. I don't know if I can call it a "system" but it is. This awareness serves as a vital starting point, a foundational element. The emotions I discern act as compass needles, indicating whether I am in sync with both my surroundings and my inner self. They become signals, urging me to discern what requires release and what demands preservation. For instance, I interpret discomfort as a potential sign calling for adjustment or change.
I share this seemingly straightforward insight because our reality is a whirlwind of rapid-paced demands. Gaining awareness of our emotions and bodily sensations isn't always a walk in the park. It necessitates carving out a bit of mental space and time, demanding conscious attention. Admittedly, there are instances where I may overlook these signals even today, after years of practice, particularly when my focus is entirely on external factors. In such times, it becomes crucial to rely on a built in habit to realign with oneself, especially when an imbalance is sensed. Asking questions like:
I've come to realize that deliberate actions and commitments to foster flexibility and adaptability form a cyclical process, consistently leading to an enhanced state and a profound sense of fulfillment.
Q5. Interviewer:
In your opinion, what is the biggest lie or myth around the topic of 'flexibility and adaptability' that is being circulated right now?
Elena's Reply
Lately, I've observed an emerging tendency where flexibility and adaptability are often portrayed with a negative undertone.
There seems to be a common misperception that these qualities signify "conforming to and embracing societal norms, rules, and values, even at the expense of one's personal freedom and autonomy."
However, it's crucial to recognize that flexibility and adaptability can be applied both to oneself and the environment, aligning with personal values and intentions. This hinges on a conscious act of will and choice. Simply put, it's essential to grasp that flexibility and adaptability don't inherently equate to compromise or sacrifice; while there might be intersections at times, they are not synonymous terms.
Q6. Interviewer:
If someone approaches you, expressing their desire to become more "flexible" in both life and work, how would you address the topic to provide support?
Elena's Reply:
I would initiate a profound conversation, delving into their internal landscape and territory. Through dialogue, I'd seek to understand the source and nature of their discomfort, comprehending what feels amiss and how they envision a different scenario. Subsequently, a gentle discussion would ensue, exploring potential actions or adjustments. I advocate for a transformative approach, whether it involves altering situations, habits, or patterns. Sometimes, it's not about specific actions but rather cultivating a fresh perspective - a process I often refer to as "training the muscle of flexibility and adaptability". We have to put in the effort to develop it.
Q7. Interviewer:
If a magical wand granted you a Christmas wish that you knew would come true, what would it be?
Elena's Reply:
I would wish for a world filled with joyous, smiling individuals living in harmony with themselves, their surroundings, nature, and the universe. A realm infused with love, understanding, and mutual recognition – that would be the ultimate miracle.
Question 8:
That's truly heartwarming. Would you like to extend a wish to the person reading this right now?
Elena's Reply:
I wish for you to embrace authenticity wholeheartedly and to fearlessly express your true feelings. Summon the courage to acknowledge both the challenging and delightful experiences, accepting them with pride. Recognizing and responding to your internal signals is the key to understanding yourself and paving the way for a higher quality of life. Remember, the ability to manage your interpretations and actions in response to life's occurrences is the most valuable skill you can cultivate.
Wishing you a Christmas brimming with joy, authenticity, and fulfillment.
Interviewer:
Thank you so so much for unfolding so delicately and concisely this topic, Eli.
It was a privilege and a pleasure.
Dear reader,
Should you wish to book a session with Elena Khodakivskaya, you can do so at:
https://www.ilc.one/our-experts
Lots of love,
The ILC team